If we feel sorry for ourselves only in the face of the events that happen to us, And if we constantly feel victimized and trapped, And if we think that everything happens only to us, It can be a really problematic situation. All sorts of things happen to all of us in life; some are difficult, Some are partly smaller and solvable…but somehow “Not everyone can always be happy and always win” Then why would you want to pity? Why do you often try to display your suffering in front of others, Looking for someone who would be happy to hear that about you, or someone who would give you the keys to closed doors, Do you think that these keys are given for free?

Self-pity and victimization

Some people easily fall into the victim role by feeling sorry for themselves. These are the people who constantly put themselves down and see themselves as victims by acting this way. They expect help from outside people to save themselves after a while, When they see that people are not helping them, They may become resentful and angry at them this time People who constantly pity themselves and play the victim are looking for someone responsible for what happened to them They struggle to find the person responsible for their feelings, jobs, and decisions.

Low self-confidence is often a reason for self-pity to enter the victim status because the person has internalized, Accepting that he can make mistakes is so inappropriate that this attitude makes him unable to take responsibility for events in life. These people try not to make the big decisions themselves.

People who pity themselves are not active but passive in their lives. These people can’t control their lives in this way. If things don’t go well, They can blame others, feel victimized, and get out of the situation. However, Even if the person feels sorry for himself and enters the psyche of the victim, When things are not going well and there are people to blame, It still feels guilty inside.

How is self-pity formed?

No one is born with a sense of self-pity in infants and young children. This sensation does not happen by itself however, If the mistakes made by a person in his childhood are reflected on the child as if they were caused by other things; for example, If a child begins to think that he or she receives attention and love from his family only when he cries or complains, or if he encounters situations like hate, or make him feel inappropriate, or excluded, His family left him alone. Then this child develops a defense mechanism for himself to survive when he grows up, And turns into the role of the victim.

Finally, let me remind you. Consider everyone who has heard your groan and seen your pallor, What did you gain from him except that you lost before him parts of you without forcing you to do so? Try to stop complaining before you lose yourself completely, Curb that desire to complain, no matter how intense your suffering. All of us, without exception, absorb a huge amount of shocks quite quietly, Not because we are unable to reveal it, but rather in order to preserve what remains of the intact parts within us. Perhaps it is useless to reveal in most cases.